Archive for the 'Sports' Category Page 2 of 2

Obi-Wade Kenobi Haiku

Duane Wade moves the ball
with his mind — J. Kidd is like

adapted from a DeathMonkey im; image grabbed from

Three Kings?


When you emerge from the subway at the corner of 125th and Lennox, your first glimpse of sunlight features the massive disembodied screaming heads of Sirs Duncan, McGrady, and Garnett. A monument to the modern NBA through the eyes of Adidas.

It’s good stuff, but one has to wonder how long a sneaker company can stick with a star like T-Mac, whose ridiculous skills just can’t seem to make those around him better. Last year, their answer was to poke a little fun at his team’s woes in Lessons 2. This year, the answer seems to be to sandwich the man between two bona-fide monsters and pray for osmosis.

What will it be next season? Will he end up a running joke like his cousin? Doubtful — the effort is there. Let’s hope, then, that Tracy and his team will give Adidas’ ad department a little more to work with before the season is out.

photo via jellisvga

Check the Trunk


With all the personal and professional chaos surrounding Kobe, you’d think he’d be keeping a low profile these days. Looking ain’t cheating, though, right? Here’s hoping Ray leaves him watching tonight.

image grabbed from espn nba

Hewitt Gets Housed

usopen2k4-federer.jpg   usopen2k4-eeew.jpg

Ever since his little stunt back in 2001, I’ve taken a fair bit of pleasure in watching Lleyton Eeewit get smacked around in the majors. Here’s a brief on his 2001 US Open stupidity. It bears repeating…

After getting called for a second foot fault in the third set, Hewitt was overheard wondering aloud to the umpire if it was a coincidence that Blake and the linesman in question were both African Americans.

“Look at him,” Hewitt said, pointing to the linesman. “Look at him,” Hewitt said, referring to Blake. “You tell me what the similarity is.”     — Greg Garber (ESPN)

Never mind that every other judge was white, this was clearly still an advantage for Blake. Classy stuff, and on the world stage no less. Blake later took the high road and let Hewitt’s outburst stand on its own. As usual, Open officials wimped out and took no disciplinary action.

While Eeewit continues to rank high and is always a threat in the Grand Slams, it’s nice to see the little bastard get punked when it does happen. And, oh did it happen when he ran into a certain buzz-saw known as Mr. Federer on Sunday. 6-0, 7-6, 6-0. Little karma for ya?

images grabbed from



End of an era. Goliath falls. Team USA doesn’t play the right way. Elimination, derision, and blame. Come on, bronze ain’t that bad! What is bad is that we didn’t learn anything from the 2002 World Basketball Championship. Hopefully, this shock will finally wake the ferry driver.

How ironic is it that Larry Brown, after winning with fundamentals, was put in charge of a team with no chance of playing fundamentally sound ball? No shooting, and only one on the inside. While there is little doubt world is catching up with us on the basketball front, what we really learned from the Bball Olympics is that a group of skilled guys who have played together for 9 months stand a pretty damn good chance of beating some of the best players in the world — if, that is, the best players are thrown together haphazard and at the last minute.

It comes down to this: Don’t blame AI or Timmy or even a guy with a choice name like Boozer. And for God’s sake don’t blame Larry. It’s the big geniuses that put the team together who need to get on the pink slip train. Bounce them and we may yet save that vein in Coach Brown’s forehead.

photo via AP

From the Law Firm of Wallace & Wallace

I’ve only got two words to say…

Hot Damn!

images grabbed from AP

Narcoleptic Dunkers of the World Unite!

There are worse places to fall asleep…… but not many!

image grabbed from AP

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